I don't want to keep blowing you off,
I just keep wanting something good to say.
Don't like to complain because I know there are
people with "real" problems...but...

It's like I'm living in another time...
My body is here but nothing else is.

I know very well the feeling of being misplaced and it's been
growing and growing as I get older and there is no one.

...Contemplation, intense and constant.

I feel like a dread-rotted lock.

I'm in NC,
I just want to RUN.

I'd give anything to smile from within.

I feel empty. More and more I feel bits of me dying off as time passes. I've dreamt my whole life away thus far.

Ran 2 miles without stopping in 19 minutes...
For me this is a big deal because running is agonizing. I find that it really helps to simmer me down though [as long as I'm running on a full night's rest].

Today I saw a bumper sticker that simply read "How's your wife and my kids?" hah but no hah...

The more I observe "serious" relationships, the more I loathe them.

I acknowledge that I'm skilled at a number of things, still though, that feeling of failure creeps in.

bereft of.

...laughing til my hands go numb.

Torn

between what's in the heart and what's easiest. how sad.

Awoke from sleep in a car with seats that wouldn't recline.